Former Rugby League Player Found Alive at 37


A 37-year-old former prop who played three games professionally before retiring when medics pronounced him a cripple has been found alive and well in his studio apartment in Penrith, in a discovery that has stunned the rugby league world.

The man credited his survival to an “unusual ability to follow instructions”, noting that after spending months on the “good painkillers” for the mishap that left him crippled, he simply stopped taking them when doctors advised him to do so.

“Everyone I knew was shocked I stop chewing the oxy, let alone using any ‘leagies’ little helpers’ like meth, codeine, LSD, benzos, heroin, MDMA, weed, cocaine, GHB, krokodil, or disco tablets,” he said. “I didn’t even get stuck into the pokies – that one really blows the King Gees off people!”

The former prop said he felt “lucky” to have lived to see his thirties, adding that if he could make it to 40, or even just a few more months, he’d be happier than Joey swinging his jaw on a Monday morning.

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