In a shocking twist during an FBI raid on President Joe Biden’s home, agents found no confidential files but instead discovered a basement teeming with unsavoury characters. The anticipated trove of top-secret documents was nowhere to be found, but the basement revealed a more disturbing cache: a collection of creepy individuals that left agents bewildered and slightly traumatised.

Eyewitnesses report that as agents descended into the basement, they encountered a scene straight out of a bad horror film. “It was like the basement from Silence of the Lambs,” one agent remarked, “only creepier.” Among the bizarre findings were individuals that Biden seemed to have a curious affinity for, given his history of uncomfortable interactions and his son Hunter’s controversial past.

The raid, initially aimed at uncovering mishandled documents, turned into a spectacle of unsettling proportions. Agents stumbled upon several life-size cardboard cutouts of young girls, each with an oversized hairbrush attached. A separate room featured an extensive collection of children’s shampoos and conditioners, prompting further questions about the President’s peculiar past behaviour.

Meanwhile, Hunter Biden’s room, dubbed “The Dungeon,” was equally disturbing. Agents found numerous photographs and chat logs pointing to Hunter’s questionable relationships. One agent commented, “It’s like a Tinder nightmare in here, but way worse.”

As news of the raid spread, the public reacted with a mix of horror and dark humour. Memes flooded social media, with captions like, “Biden’s Basement: Where the Real Scandals Are Kept” and “Confidential Files? Nah, Just Creeps.” Late-night comedians had a field day, with one joking, “Turns out Biden’s basement is the new Epstein Island. Who knew?”

In response to the findings, the White House issued a statement claiming, “The President and his family are deeply disturbed by the unwarranted invasion of privacy. Any allegations of inappropriate behaviour are categorically denied and will be addressed by our legal team.”

As the investigation continues, one thing is clear: the raid on Biden’s home has opened a Pandora’s box of controversies. Whether or not the President and his son will face any legal repercussions remains to be seen, but for now, the basement’s unsettling revelations have given the public plenty to talk about—and plenty to meme.