Workers Return from Holidays Feeling Refreshed Hatred for their Jobs

Billions of Sydneysiders have returned to work today feeling refreshed hatred for their jobs after experiencing two weeks of life outside the office. One man said he’d always known going to work was “balls”, but that after enjoying such luxuries as seeing his wife and kids and eating lunch away from his keyboard over the… Read More Workers Return from Holidays Feeling Refreshed Hatred for their Jobs

Man Forgets He’s not at Work and Pisses All Over Home Toilet

A Sydney man this morning has had an embarrassing blunder after he pissed all over his home toilet seat, floor, hand towel, roof, vanity mirror and a bit out the window after forgetting he wasn’t at work. “I was on autopilot ­– or maybe it was auto fire,” the man said. “I simply forgot where… Read More Man Forgets He’s not at Work and Pisses All Over Home Toilet

Federal Budget 2017 Forces First Homebuyers to Live in Self-storage Boxes

Savvy first homebuyers looking to get into the not-being-homeless market in Sydney after today’s Federal Budget announcement have begun investing in “alternative housing”, with self-storage boxes from companies such as TaxiBox emerging as a popular choice. “I was originally going to store my stuff and sleep on the street but then I saw the words… Read More Federal Budget 2017 Forces First Homebuyers to Live in Self-storage Boxes

Man Wastes Sickie Feeling Anxious About Taking Sickie

A Sydney man has wasted his sick day today feeling bad about taking the sickie in which he planned in advance with well-timed coughs in front of his boss yesterday afternoon. “I started to get anxious about it around 9:04 this morning,” the man said. “Instead of simply enjoying having the house all to myself and masturbating in rooms… Read More Man Wastes Sickie Feeling Anxious About Taking Sickie