Twitter users are getting in phenomenal physical shape, burning thousands of calories “literally shaking right now” over everything for hours. One user said the results had been nothing short of sorcery. “Every area of my body was a problem area,” said the Twitter user and moderator of r/Australia. “But the weight has been melting after… Read More Twitter users getting shredded by “literarily shaking right now”
Gymgoers are reporting phenomenal groin gains from the choice of saucy music clips played while trying to work out. “I tripled in size during a single warmup,” said one fitness fanatic. “I’ve never been so swole.” Some gym members aren’t as pleased about the video girth-supplements. “I had such an intense sausage pump after Kylie… Read More Music videos played in gyms producing anabolic trouser growth
One local man has done it again and got himself into winter body shape to comfortably handle the cooler temperatures. “I got myself into such great winter shape this year I can still wear shorts and a singlet to work, funerals, and even the bottle-o cool room,” said the portly man. “Nothing can penetrate my… Read More Man “winter body ready” for the 11th year straight
A service launched in Sydney today that allows “time-poor” clients to relax while personal trainers work out on their behalf. The new service, called Fitness 4 U, is designed for busy Sydneysiders who’d rather be drinking at work, drinking at the pub, or drinking at home than exercise. One of the first members of the… Read More New Personal Training Service Where Trainers do the Workout for You
A new version of the popular hook-up-with-as-many-people-as-you-can app, Tinder, allows those who spend hours admiring themselves in the mirror inside the gym, to admire themselves outside of the gym as well. A spokesperson for the app, titled Tinder Swole, said the app cleverly matches the user with themselves, so they can truly find the love… Read More New Tinder for Gym Junkies app allows Fitness Folk to Hook Up with Themselves
Me First gym has opened in Bondi over the weekend providing locals with what the gym says is “none of the unnecessary exercise fads like weights and treadmills” to free up the space for thousands of mirrors covering every single surface for selfies. “The most important part about exercise is letting everybody on social media know… Read More Selfie Gym Opens in Bondi with Just Mirrors
A receptionist at a popular chain of Sydney gyms was today sentenced to 60 years in prison for revealing the gym’s joining fee and monthly payments up front and honestly. “This was a serious violation of our rules,” a spokesperson for the gym said. “The highly secretive pricing structure of gym memberships should only be… Read More Gym Employee Jailed for Revealing Membership Prices Up Front
The Sydney Sentinel 