REPORT: nobody cares where you stick your dong

It has been revealed today that nobody cares where or who consenting adults decide to throw their bellend into during the darker hours.  “I’ve popped my diamond cutter into plaster surgical gloves, a rotisserie chicken, and a greengrocer’s worth of fruit,” said one man. “It’s not pride. It’s not sin. It’s just what it is.”… Read More REPORT: nobody cares where you stick your dong

Netflix-like Service Lifeflix to Become Substitute to Having a Life

Start-up company Lifeflix will next month begin streaming scenes of ordinary day-to-day life to thousands of lounge rooms across Australia. Inspired by the never-leave-the-couch enjoyment of Netflix, the new service will provide sitting-down fanatics with point-of-view shots putting viewers in the centre of the action in a bank queue, traffic jam, or waiting on the… Read More Netflix-like Service Lifeflix to Become Substitute to Having a Life

NYE Disappoints for the 2,018th Year in a Row

New Year’s Eve celebrations have disappointed people across the world for the 2,018th year in a row, with many revellers waking up with a jolt of fear early this morning. One Sydney-sider described the evening as a lethal cocktail of hope, joy and festivity. “Whenever I’m feeling good, things go really bad,” he said. “I… Read More NYE Disappoints for the 2,018th Year in a Row