Man had “Nothing to Wear” on Run this Morning

A Clovelly man is in danger of missing his daily run along the coastal path to Bondi this morning after realising he had “nothing to wear”, even though his closet was packed full of designer workout gear, joggers made by NASA and colour-coordinated drink bottles. The man said he “just wasn’t feeling” any of his… Read More Man had “Nothing to Wear” on Run this Morning

Secret to Being Cool Girl Who Eats Like a Man and Looks Like a Model Revealed

The secret to being one of those cool girls who eats and drinks like a man but still looks like a Victoria’s Secret model is to only eat when cameras or people you want to impress are around, a blogger has revealed in a tell-all post. Chloe, a model/blogger who shot to fame after becoming… Read More Secret to Being Cool Girl Who Eats Like a Man and Looks Like a Model Revealed

Cooked Sashimi set to be Sydney’s Next Food Craze

Cooked sashimi is widely tipped to become Sydney’s hottest new food trend after a new Bondi Beach takeaway opened to rave reviews over the weekend. “What we do is roll flake in batter and then boil it in oil,” the mastermind behind the venture said. “It’s like nothing you’ve ever tried before.” Bloggers have been… Read More Cooked Sashimi set to be Sydney’s Next Food Craze

Calls for Warning Labels on Avocados as the Fruit Smashes People Back

The fruit responsible for preventing people from being able to afford waterfront mansions in Sydney is continuing its reign of terror by causing brunch-lovers to slice their own hands open, experts have warned. “The avocado has a natural booby-trap built in to protect themselves from hipster folk,” a government health spokesperson said. “When a bearded… Read More Calls for Warning Labels on Avocados as the Fruit Smashes People Back

Instagram Models Outnumber Regular People in Bondi

The number of people taking highly crafted Photoshopped selfies to upload to Instragram has overtaken the general population in Bondi Beach, a new report has revealed. Regular-beautiful-person-turned-Instagram-star Chloe said good-looking people who don’t share their lives on Instagram are “just being selfish”, adding that she takes “a lot of pride in what she has achieved”… Read More Instagram Models Outnumber Regular People in Bondi

More Cocaine on Bondi Banknotes than You Could Buy with the Money

The amount of cocaine found on banknotes circulating Bondi is now worth more than the money itself, new research has shown. Bondi banknotes carry so much cocaine they are now officially classed as narcotics in their own right, prompting many in the fashionable suburb to simply eat banknotes on a night out instead of swapping… Read More More Cocaine on Bondi Banknotes than You Could Buy with the Money