Larger-than-life pop star Lizzo has come under fire today for cultural appropriation after taking an Australian name.
“I’m deeply offended,” said Sydney local Robbo. “Anything with an O on the end of it is a unique part of Aussie culture – from servo to bowlo. This is as insensitive as that episode of Red Faces that sent Harry Connick Jr to have a stroke, heart attack, and shart himself all at once.”
The Minister for Bogans agrees.
“Many Australians have had a gutful of non-Australians using our culture for their own gain, so Lizzo adopting something as sacred as an O on the end of her name is both disrespectful and degrading.”
One local music fan agrees.
“Her fame has clearly gone to her head, arms, torso, and legs to think she can get away with something so serious,” said the man. “I propose she makes reparations by giving all Australians a cut of her royalties. It’s time she paid the rent.”
The Sydney Sentinel reached out to Lizzo for comment, but she was still too puffed from checking the mailbox last week.