Blockade Australia protesters take the day off due to cold weather

Blockade Australia have taken today off from chucking rubbish about the place and screaming at people going to work in the name of the environment, as it was “far too chilly to be outside today in Sydney”.

“Not even a hot activated almond soy latte could get me out from under the doona today,” said one activist wearing his most woolly hat. “So, it was a day of ripping hot ones from my glass oboe to beat the winter chill.”

Other protesters have agreed. “Not even my hourly Welcome to Country smoking ceremony warmed me up enough to go outside,” added another climate activist.

“It’s a real shame,” said The University of Sydney’s Bachelor of Protesting degree professor. “As we’ve found the best way to win over regular Australians is to annoy the absolute shit out of them.”

Protesters have claimed that today’s drastically lower pollution levels were due to their previous two days of protesting and had nothing to do with traffic being back to normal.

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