Safe injection rooms announced for Bondi

Waverley Council today has announced that it will introduce safe injection rooms across Bondi to give those needing a Botox touch-up a safe place to inject within a VIP setting.

“It’s all part of keeping Bondi beautiful – and safe,” said a council spokesperson. “Far too many elites have suffered withdrawals such as facial expressions, which is the leading cause of wrinkles, that have no place in Bondi. This way, locals can safely give themselves a top-up shot at even the slightest hint of a smile forming.”

Locals have praised the move. “I almost got served an eviction notice the other day after raising an eyebrow,” said one Bondi resident. “Luckily, the eyebrow raise was due to judging some undesirables from Maroubra, so I was given a pass.”

The rooms will be made entirely of mirrors, so locals can touch up themselves or their noses before heading back to their selfless influencing duties.

Full bar service and poke bowls will be available for residents with MyFitnessPal proving they are under Bondi’s strict daily calorie allowance of 4kJ.

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