Confusion as men told they can have babies yet have no say on abortion

Deep confusion pains have set in for men who have been told they can now have babies yet at the same time don’t have any say on abortion.

“After discovering men can suddenly have babies in 2022, I was a touch concerned about falling pregnant,” said one man. “I’m not keen on starting a family right now, however, being a man, I’m not permitted to have a say if I have an abortion or not. I think I better stick to jazz mags for a while to be safe.”

The man is not alone in his concerns. “I’ve started using condoms for the first time in my life,” said one man. “As if I fall pregnant, only my wife – as a woman – can legally have any say on if I keep the baby or not. And since we can’t even agree on what to have for dinner, I’m not overly optimistic.”

The Minister of Biology refused to comment on the issue, urging people that it’s best to learn biology from Twitter than from science these days.

Gender Studies students are equally frustrated with the ever-changing and confusing subject of gender. “The definition of a man or woman changed yet again as I was taking my final exams, so I not only failed but was labelled as a Nazi by my professor and forced to cancel myself from university.”

Men hope Twitter discovers men can fly next year, so they can “go anywhere else but this clown world.”

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