Tom Hanks outs himself as a complete idiot

Tom Hanks has recently come out as a complete flip by saying he should never have played a gay character since he is not gay, missing the point entirely of what an actor’s job is – which is to act.

“Does the bloke think the actors who played Hitler were mass-murdering fascists in real life?” said one normal person. “Is he going to also apologise for playing an astronaut, a mentally disabled boy born with a crooked spine, or a WWII hero?”

“Actors seem to have forgotten that their job is to play a character and not actually be the damn person they are pretending to be,” said the Minister of Movies. “I didn’t once think that Tom Hanks was a CGI cowboy named Woody, and I’m sure no toys were offended.”

Experts are worried that Tom Hanks has once again used Zoltar as he did in Big, but instead of becoming an adult, he has reverted to a toddler.

One gay actor anonymously added, “does this mean I can no longer play Maverick in Top Gun because I’m not straight?”

Hopefully, no more to come…

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