Sydney Man’s Arms Torn Off as he Refuses to use Trolley for Big Shop

BASKET

A Sydney man has lost both his arms after they were torn clean from his shoulders in his local supermarket when he refused to use a trolley for a larger-than-usual shop.

The man said he knew he was testing gravity when he added a two-litre bottle of chocolate milk to his already-heavy basket, but insisted that losing his arms was a small price to pay to protect his trendy supermarket image.

“Basket users have the highest street cred in the supermarket, that’s a fact,” the man said. “If I switch to a trolley I’m basically telling everyone I’ve given up on life and will be spending my evenings smashing frozen pizzas and Neapolitan ice cream.”

This isn’t the first time a shopper has lost his arms after refusing to use a trolley for a large shop, a supermarket spokesperson said.

“It’s opened up a whole new business for us selling prosthetic arms,” she said. “We couldn’t be happier.”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s