The government today released a list of Australia’s top spots for dole bludging, with Blacktown being named as the number one town in NSW for not going to work yet expecting to be paid.

“We’re stoked to be awarded first place,” one Blacktown local and welfare lover said.

“Blacktown’s been doing it tough lately, and I think being number one in something will really give those in the community a reason to put their shoulders back and walk tall into Centrelink.”

The town will be holding a ticker tape parade tonight to celebrate their achievement.

One local told The Sydney Sentinel that even though he will be marching under the “compo claim” banner, his fake injury wouldn’t stop him from marching tonight unless he can’t be bothered to turn up.

More to come as the residents of Blacktown wake up this afternoon to hear the news…