Australian Postal Workers Win International Knock & Run Championships


Australian postal workers have taken out the 98th annual Knock & Run championships, receiving the award at a government-funded gala rumoured to cost tax payers $7.2 million.

The award celebrates the art, usually practiced by teenagers, of knocking on someone’s door then running away before they answer, leaving the resident mildly confused when they open the door to find no one there.

A Knock & Run judge congratulated Australian postal workers for taking things to the next level by also leaving a card that taunts victims by informing them “no one was home” and advising them to collect their parcel at the nearest post office during the most inconvenient working hours imaginable, a Knock & Run judge said.

“They’re like ninjas,” he said. “They remind me of Chris Farley in Beverly Hills Ninja”

One postal worker, who has managed to avoid ever delivering a parcel to a resident, said during his acceptance speech that managing to leave a card at the door of a homeowner who was watering his front garden at the time was “a particular highlight” of his career.

The trophy was lost in transit from the award ceremony to the office and postal workers have said “there is nothing they can do” to locate it.

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