Australian Prime Minister Malcolm Turnbull has said not even a shirtfronting from former PM Tony Abbott would do much to help nine Australian men jailed in Malaysia after an advertising stunt for Budgy Smuggler swimwear went wrong during the country’s Formula One Grand Prix.

“They’ve been in private schools their whole lives,” a defense lawyer said. “When they’re told to drop their pants, they do it. No questions asked.”

The nine, all of who have wealthy family connections, are said to be finding their jail cells “novel”, with one saying this “must be what life is like for those people who Uncle Joe Hockey said can’t get a good job that pays good money.”

Millionaires across Australia are said to be asking their servants to #PutOutYourOnionBags in support of the nine.